Thursday, November 15, 2012

“Lost our spot in line??”…..


We received word today that our fifth transfer is negative, again. The remaining embryos we did have remaining didn't survive the thawing.

Kev and I just spent the past several hours crying, asking each other why?
OMG, it’s been since a hell of a year!!! We are so distraught from pain… words, they just cant describe, just so hard to form at this point.
This morning Anjani reiterated to us that our medical team suggests that Kevin travel back to India again to give fresh samples as discussed earlier.
Kevin is extremely adamant about continuing our avenue at all cost to surrogacy with KIC.
I , I don’t know…this, right now...is a tremendous struggle for me. It's so thick for me to explain to live... or…or to feel. Anger and such sorrow fills me in a way…I cant barely breath!!!

I see the light at the end of this struggle, I….WE both do. The now..the now WE just…just cant understand the present…the feeling , dealing with and struggling through all of this???? Just don’t understand???
We don’t know where we are going to go from here. We will keep you posted.

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